Where Is My Mind?

So, sometimes, I stay in. There are so many great music nights here in San Diego. I am friends with enough DJs to keep going and going....but sometimes, I just want to explore new music and mix tracks together while doing so. Two monitors makes it much easier. I miss having three computers, but the wife took hers, and I gave the other to a brother. The interesting part here, is, I look at just what the hell I played when I wake up the next day. Some of these "mixes" are so eclectic, I can't fathom what I was feeling when I lined up the tracks. I say feeling, not thinking, for certainly it's all about the feel and rational thought is ignored. A "happy" song or two, and then a very dark one is wedged in. Nostalgia seems to be a running theme. The track list starts out with dancey, newish material and crashes into a wall of the music of my youth in the end. With YouTube, this pattern can really make me feel a certain sense of degeneration. YouTube has so many songs that I simply lost, own on cassette or never owned at all. The images of the video aren't so important as the actual song. Just finding that 80's alternative track that I haven't heard in 20 plus years evokes a lot of emotion....and I hated every day of my childhood. I think music was and continues to be an escape for me. Some aspect of this escape is a positive and certainly some of it can be negative.